BTW, Aaron Henne's second section of This Los Angeles Life: Writing for Solo Performance on Sunday, January 10th is now full! There is a waiting list available.
Writing Prompt: Look around your house or office for something with a warning label. Write the warning down and write whatever comes to mind for 10 minutes. Or use this warning label that I found on my Sunkist Fruit Snacks when I was rushing around my kitchen, shoving the gummy fruit shapes in my mouth:
"To avoid choking, give Fruit Flavored Snacks to children who can easily swallow chewy foods. Children should be seated and supervised while eating."
Maybe I should be seated and supervised. ;)
Comment on this blog! Write about a warning label. It can be a sentence or a mini story. I will respond with what I like and remember and you will be entered in the contest for a free class!
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9 comments:
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Marilyn
Such warning labels could be an artifact of our time, to be discovered by a taller, fitter, smarter version of us. They will deduce that our infants were very stupid, that we were slow developers, that our baby bodies were exceedingly fragile. "No wonder", they will say, "that they didn't make it".
Eric,
I love this piece--it is very imaginative! I loved the taller, fitter, smarter version of us, and that the baby bodies were exceedingly fragile. Great job!
Marilyn
Partially true story:
Here's a reminder to myself: do not talk on your cell phone why driving in the dark rainstorm. I don't care if you are busy and have a million things to do for your wedding and there aren't enough hours in the day. Don't do it.
You might drive over a librarian's foot.
As you hear her toe bones crunch under the tread of your tire, you will feel the biggest pang of guilt stab your stomach.
The guilt will be so strong that it will knock over buildings, release water from dams and make you feel like the most idiotic, selfish person on this earth for at least two full days and two full nights.
Marilyn
Next time you are driving distracted, try to run over an investment banker instead.
This advice will be noted by the narrator of my story. ;)
Marilyn
On the bottom of a box containing vitamin based beverage materials, after it states its benefits to the user's body and mind - "These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease."
This is the way to live, I tell ya'!
Step One - Make a statement. For example, "I have a full head of hair."
Step Two - Allow someone to respond to said statement. "No, Aaron, as is plainly obvious, you are bald."
Step Three - Deny that you intended any truth in your original statement of fact. "The above mentioned has not been evaluated by any person, living or dead, nor by any mirror or reflective surface. This head is not intended to appear filled and/or covered with stimulated, and thus active, follicles."
Aaron--I love this story!
I love the clear example of the baldness. I love the follicles. It is hilarious!
Marilyn
Not wanting to leave my desk at the office, I glanced around to find the first object with a warning label. It happens to be on an empty bottle of cleaning duster, you know, the stuff that you spray on your keys to get rid of all that unwanted dust that creeps into your hard drive. For a product that has such a small purpose, "clean dust", it is quite a powerful and dangerous substance.
I say this for a few reasons because as I look at the label it reads words like "Flammable" "FATAL", and "frostbite". Pretty amazing that this product can both burn your skin and freeze it, huh? It happens all the time, we use these products for simple desires of cleanliness that can do immense harm and destruction, not only to our bodies but to our world when handled improperly.
One example that comes to mind is a woman that was on the show "Intervention". She was a poor, seemingly hopeless woman who had an addiction to the stuff I'm talking about here. She would huff nearly twenty to thirty cans of this dust cleaning spray daily. DAILY! She claims that it left her in a supernatural and euphoric state of mind. That is her perspective of feeling from the virulent, but to outsiders she was a worthless pile of human sludge. Incoherently attempting to speak to the camera and construct sentences only to fail miserably. It was one of those situations were I felt genuine pity for this woman. It was devastating to see this woman, once full of life and vitality be reduced to a human void of anything worthy to society.
It got me thinking about how all of these household cleaning products are in every single home in America, but there I don't remember these being discussed in my DARE class as a youth. It was always weed, crack and smack. I'm not saying that these drugs shouldn't be mentioned in those Governmental issued awareness programs, but in my opinion I think these products, that are so ubiquitous and accessible, should be regulated so that young children aren't making the same mistakes with experimentation as the woman from "Intervention." On a drug side note, it disappoints me that a herbal drug from the earth, Marijuana, is continually condemned as a class one threat drug that is ruining the world.
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